TIP 27. GIRLS AND CUDDLES
In the same way that boys need to wrestle or have physical contests with their dads to establish and strengthen their identity as males, so girls need to have a different kind of contact to assist in the development of their self image as a female. Because of the vastly different emotional make-up between boys and girls we need to develop a parenting plan that acknowledges this. The understanding required in raising boys and raising girls is very different, although their basic need is to have the touch and acceptance of their father.
Girls and young woman often look at their dads as 'heroes' and 'knights in shining armour', as protectors and leaders in the home. It is primarily the relationship with their father that will form the basis of their self image as a woman and what they can expect in life.
When a father treats his daughter well, and tells her often that she is 'beautiful' and 'clever' and 'a princess' she will accept his assessment of her as truth and begin to act and live out of that picture. She will become 'beautiful' and 'clever' and 'a princess' because that will be the picture she has of herself on the inside, her self image. As she grows in life she will automatically gravitate toward relationships where she is treated well and respected by men, because that was how her dad treated her.
However if a father treats his daughter badly and puts her down or abuses her in any way, it will shape her perception of the world in general, and as she grows up she will gravitate toward relationships where she is treated badly or abused. This is often because bad treatment or abuse is what she feels she deserves in life, because that was the way her dad treated her.
How vitally important then is it for us as fathers to treat our daughters as our own 'beautiful princesses' and to love and honour them in such a way as to shape their life for success and not failure.
Girls need to be cuddled and tickled by their dads often as it strengthens their sense of self worth immensely and ensures that they feel accepted within the family. She may think "Dad is the head of the home, and if he feels I am worthy of this attention, then I must be a worthwhile person too!"
Dads' Call To Action:
Spend quality time with your daughter, give her cuddles and tickles and kisses and let her know often that she is your 'beautiful little princess'.
(Proverbs 23 v 7)
For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.