Great Dads give their children lots of encouragement.
Why we give encouragement
Whether we as dads are raising boys or raising girls, we are able to make a positive impact in their young lives by consistently giving them encouragement.
Joshua 1:9 Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
The Definition of “Encouragement”
1. To inspire with hope, courage, or confidence.
2. To give support to
3. To stimulate
‘Encouragement is the act of inspiring, supporting or stimulating others by giving them hope, courage and confidence.’ When we encourage our children, we give them courage for life and play a large part in developing their self-esteem. Self-esteem grows stronger as our children feel loved and accepted and builds within them a strong sense of feeling capable to handle anything in life.
Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
The Definition of “Discouragement”
1. To deprive of confidence, hope, or spirit
2. To dissuade or deter from doing something:
3. To try to prevent by expressing disapproval or raising objections
‘Discouragement is the act of depriving, dissuading or deterring others by taking away their hope, courage or confidence through an expression of disapproval or raised objections’. When we discourage our children, we take courage from them and often damage their self-esteem. Taking from our children their sense of feeling capable in life can have far-reaching detrimental effects upon them.
How we give encouragement
Psalm 45:1 My tongue is the pen of a ready writer.
1.Our words as a father are incredibly powerful, they can either build or destroy the inner life of our child. It is vital to realise that as their father we are perhaps their greatest influence in life. Therefore, we need to speak good things over our children consistently if we want them to grow up as happy, confident and well-adjusted members of society.
Speaking Words: ‘You Can Do It Champ!’ or ‘Just Do Your Best Sweetheart’ assists them as they prepare for an upcoming event or challenge in life.
Speaking Words: ‘Well Done!’, ‘Great Job!’, ‘Congratulations!’ will show them they have your approval and acknowledgement after they have succeeded in an area of life.
Speaking Words: ‘Never Mind I’m Sure You’ll Do Better Next Time’, ‘Good Try Anyway’ or ‘Maybe We Can Think Up A Better Way To Do That Together’ etc assists them when they may fail in a certain aspect of life or objective and shows them that they still have your support as their father.
2. Our actions as a father such as shaking hands, giving them the thumbs up gesture, patting them on the back or merely placing a gentle hand upon them imparts love and encouragement to a young heart.
3. A smile upon a father’s face means much to a child, it says that their actions have made you happy and creates a sense of satisfaction in their heart.
4. Cheering from the sideline as they participate in a game or challenge is a wonderful way to show your support for your child.
5. Boasting a little about your child’s achievements within their hearing lets them know how proud you are of them.
When we give encouragement
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:
The timing of giving encouragement to our children is also important if we are to avoid diluting or diminishing its effectiveness to the point where it is no longer believed by our child. “Oh, you always say that Dad!” is a clear sign that we have been a little over zealous with our praise for our child, and in over-doing it may have created an inability within our child to receive praise and encouragement. Remember encouragement must be based in honesty if it is to be accepted. So when should we give them encouragement?
Good behaviour gives us an excellent opportunity to give encouragement and to reinforce what are the benefits of correct conduct. Sporting achievements are often a great time to express words of praise especially if you know that they have trained hard to earn them. Academic achievements are very important to celebrate as our interest and encouragement will often inspire your child to continue to apply themselves to furthering their education.
Personal breakthroughs in a child’s life are an occasion to rejoice as a family whether it be a goal reached finally or a bad habit broken a father can show his approval through his joy. Milestones like birthdays, graduations and advancements often give us as fathers an opening to honestly speak words of encouragement to our child.
Personally, I believe that even more significant than acquiring the understanding of exactly why, how and when we give encouragement is the importance that as a father that we DO give encouragement. Encouragement flows out of the heart of love we have for our child and our desire to see them get every opportunity in life to be successful. As fathers continue to speak encouraging words and show love through their actions of encouragement their children are strengthened and given the courage they will need to achieve great things.
How do you rate as a Great Dad?
Try our 2 minute online survey
Dads' UNI can also assist you in continuing to develop your own fathering style through a Free subscription that emails you a Fathering Tip each week.